The service-ethic of a true servant • Better to live at a distance from the dhāma than risk making offences • The joy of service is the devotee’s sole motive • The beauty of yukta-vairāgya is lost on impersonalists • Thinking one is unworthy to serve grants one the qualification to serve • Parokṣa (indirect) darśana versus pratyakṣa (direct) darśana • Worrying about the well-being of one’s soul is appropriate selfishness
śrī śrī guru-gaurāṅgau jayataḥ
Śrī Devānanda Gauḍīya Maṭha
Tegharipara, Navadvipa (Nadia)
21/11/1977
Snehāspadāsu—
Mā Umā! You write so many letters, one after another, yet never lose your patience, so I cannot help but praise you with a hundred mouths for your patience and tolerance. You are especially skilful for having broken my Jaḍa Bharata-like silence after so long and activating my pen, and for that, I am conveying to you infinite thanks. I am truly amazed and even stunned to see that your enthusiasm for writing letters never faltered, despite not having the convenience of my responses, as I did not want to respond. May Śrī Śrī Guru-Gaurāṅga-Rādhā-Vinoda-Bihārī-jīu grant you even more enthusiasm and patience.
Do not be disturbed about my physical ill health, because, if need be, I must take my sick body out preaching, and there is no reason to be upset about that. Just going to see a good doctor does not rid one of disease; the illness will not subside until the results of one’s karma are exhausted. Rest that is devoid of service makes one dehārāmī (“body-indulgent”) and gehārāmī (“home-indulgent”). Auspiciousness lies in thinking about service in all conditions of life. You should know service to be real leisure. If I do not become disturbed, no one can cast me into inconvenience. My favourite secluded environment or place is wherever I have the convenience to chant śrī harināma and gain the fortune to hear and recite hari-kathā and the scriptures; wherever I can perform sādhana-bhajana. Cultivation of śrī nāma and bhagavat-kathā in the association of sādhus is true solitude; that is the only thing I yearn for. The service ethic of a servant has no place for rest or holiday, because for a real servant a condition averse to service is beyond the scope of imagination.
Why would Māyāpura-dhāma reveal itself to a sevaka or sevikā if he or she does not worship its nine forests, which are the splendour of its form? If one considers śrī dhāma to be a mundane township, then offences to the dhāma befall one. Only by śrī dhāma’s mercy can one realize its transcendental nature and appearance, and only then can one become acquainted with its true compassion. “Māyā kṛpā kari’ jāla uṭhāya jakhana, ā̃khi dekhe suviśāla cinmaya bhavana[1] – when Māyā has mercy and lifts the veil, then the eyes see the vast spiritual abode.” This is transcendental vision. Disregard, in its various expressions, for śrī dhāma, for Dhāmeśvara (the Lord of that holy abode), and for the sādhus who have taken shelter of the dhāma, is also considered one of the offences to the dhāma. Only if one gains the mercy of Śrī Gaura-dhāma can one attain the qualification to serve the transcendental Vraja-dhāma. That is why the eternally perfected intimate associate of Śrī Gaura, mahājana Śrīla Narottama Ṭhākura Mahāśaya, has sung: “śrī gauḍa-maṇḍala-bhūmi, jebā jāne cintāmaṇi, tā̃ra haya vraja-bhūme vāsa[2] – those who know this land of Śrī Gauḍa to be made of wish-fulfilling gemstone attain residence in the land of Vraja.” Therefore, rather than inviting dhāma-aparādha upon oneself, it is much better to live at a distance and, recognizing that one’s own misfortune and bad luck are responsible, yearn to serve śrī dhāma and the residents of the dhāma and remember them. These sorts of thoughts prove favourable to amānī-mānada-dharma.
The sevaka’s realization of his incapacity and disqualification inspires him to serve Śrī Hari, guru, and Vaiṣṇavas. Service is never possible with an attitude that is prone to material enjoyment. So, if one adopts caution in all areas, one develops finesse in service, which is why “I venerate with caution – vando muĩ sāvadhāna mate”. The devotee’s sole motive is to be devoted to the joy of serving guru and Vaiṣṇavas, and that alone is the main connection needed to attract and attain their transcendental affection. There is no place for mundane exchanges in this.
It is only proper that spiritually-minded persons be concerned with artha (wealth), because artha facilitates the accumulation of paramārtha. Only devotees realize and appreciate this supreme truth. “Prāṇair-arthair-dhiyā vācā śreya ācaraṇaṁ sadā – one ought to pursue the ultimate good with one’s life, money, intelligence, and words.” This is a truth only the servant realizes. The kevalādvaita-vādī monists, who are absorbed in contemplation of a featureless divinity, adopt a dry and empty sort of renunciation referred to as markaṭa-vairāgya (monkey mendicancy) and, trapping themselves in the idea that “one should always consider wealth to be worthless – artham-anarthaṁ bhāvayen-nityam,” advertise their personal heroics by rejecting even those objects of the senses that are favourable to the service of Śrī Hari, thinking them to be useless. The beauty of service found in yukta-vairāgya (holistic renunciation) is never theirs to realize and appreciate. “Tomāra dhana tomāya diye tomāra haye rai – I give to You what is already Your wealth, and thus I remain Yours.” This is beyond their comprehension.
“Everyone is sincerely and excellently serving guru.” This sort of attitude aids the performance of bhajana and is uplifting. “Vaiṣṇava haiyā āpanāre māne tṛṇādhama[3] – when one becomes a Vaiṣṇava, one naturally considers oneself lowlier than a blade of grass.” The thought “I am unworthy of rendering service” grants one the qualification to serve. Yearning for unwavering conviction in śrī guru and Vaiṣṇavas for firm devotion and for a selfless propensity to serve constitutes the innermost motive of the true servant.
Guru and Vaiṣṇavas do not nurture within themselves hopes of attaining any sort of mundane respect or status available in this world. Rather, they are the embodiments of the following: “pratiṣṭhāra svabhāva ei jagate vidita, je nā vañche tāra haya vidhātā nirmita[4] – the nature of prestige is well known in this world; those who do not hanker for it are blessed with it by fate.” Never are they agitated or distressed by the puerile devotions or remarks of the material world. They do not see the faults in others. This is the exemplary quality and speciality of their immortal character.
Whether I stay in Navadvīpa or go out preaching, I have come to regard both situations as one. I go out traveling to collect provisions for the service of the maṭha in Śrī Navadvīpa, for the maṭha’s servants, for my śikṣā-gurus, and for the śrī vigraha established there in the śrī maṭha, and I go out to preach the message of śrī guru and Bhagavān and propagate śrī nāma. Therefore, if the motive is one and the same in both circumstances, then it is my firm belief that whoever comes to the śrī maṭha at whatever time to take darśana, there is no chance of their being deprived of darśana (adarśana-yoga). In this case, the superiority and reality of parokṣa (indirect, invisible) darśana versus pratyakṣa (direct, visible) darśana is a matter of special experience and realization. This will make sense to you some day.
“Sevā se niyama – service, that is the rule.” If service is not our motive, then living in the maṭha is the same as living anywhere else. There is no joy or charm in taking my ill body out preaching. Many think, “Even if he were told to stay in the maṭha, he would not, because everyone is attached to money.” Then again, others want to say, “He can’t eat the bogrā (unhusked, musty, fat-grain, autumn rice that is mixed with grit and husks) rice in the maṭha, so he finds it better to stay away.” Someone else spreads rumours: “He goes around outside eating rich dishes, touring about, and to keep the maṭha-resident sevakas in ‘check’, he sends them a measly 100 to 150 rupees a month and avoids his responsibilities.” But the individuals who are circulating all this gossip share the same responsibility to take care of the maṭha. How much financial support are any of them offering per year to the central maṭha? As soon as the topic of support comes up, no one has anything to say, because then the responsibility would fall on their shoulders. Up till now, these same people have come to me and said, “Somehow or other keep managing things. Don’t let go of your responsibility.” Today they are saying, “Stop all expenditures for the maṭha, then everything will be taken care of nicely.” How does that reconcile things? Those who criticize for no good reason have facilities like stoves, heaters, and cookers to prepare rice and mashed potatoes in their own time. They order their own milk and have their own independent arrangements for food and drink. They offer lip service, saying: “You should sit here in the maṭha. Don’t worry about anything; just start your writing work.” But when it is time to do something, everyone is indifferent to the wondrous need for rice. By mouth, they say, “Yes!” But by actions, they are saying, “No.” Good work will never be possible with this sort of two-faced policy. It is a matter of great delight that you have accepted a vow of service to provide Śrī Śrī Jagannātha-deva with outfits.
I am sad to know that you wrote two letters but did not post them because you thought I would be annoyed. If I get a letter from you, be it sooner or be it later, I always respond. Who is not happy to receive letters from one who is dear to them? So there was no reason for you to hesitate in sending me the letters. I have decided to go to Purī-dhāma, but it will not be possible for me to halt in Chunchura on the way. When I am on my way back from there, I will try to go to Chunchura. —— Mahārāja asked for money for the Siliguri maṭha from a person that Hare Kṛṣṇa [Prabhu] and I know. That person had agreed to give five thousand rupees in the service of the Purī maṭha. —— collected this money and wants to use it as he pleases to make a mosaic in the Purī maṭha. I went to so much effort to explain to him that it would be better to complete the half-finished rooms first, which will also increase the maṭha’s income. Even though I have asked him not to do this, he has gone ahead with this work to show off his capabilities. Now everyone is whimsical and does as they please. Those who have taken responsibility to forbid certain activities and provide discipline are speechless and are modest persons. There is no possibility of a transgression of etiquette or offence if you write a letter to the servant in the middle of writing to the master.
Even people in spiritual society need to abide somewhat by worldly conduct and behaviour. Since Sarayū Dīdī’s body is ill, you have become duty-bound to return to Chunchura swiftly. You still have a sense of duty and responsibility to her. She was central to your entrance on to this spiritual path. You cannot disregard that. Therefore, you will surely have to endeavour to serve her, even though she does not expect that. Wherever a human being gains the good fortune of being fearlessly and uninhibitedly engaged in hearing, chanting, etc., receiving darśana and rendering service is always a desirable environment. The opportunity to gain love and compassion arises only if one can become selfish in the truest sense. There is no cause for the master to be annoyed or disturbed in any way by that. The sādhaka or sādhikā reaps real well-being precisely by worrying about the well-being of his or her soul, and that is appropriate “selfishness”. In the absence of direct association with devotees, parokṣa sādhu-saṅga (internal association with saints) or contemplating and remembering [Bhagavān’s] beautiful name, form, qualities, etc. aids in the performance of bhajana. Separation from Bhagavān and Bhagavān’s devotees makes the heart restless and anxious, but there is no material sorrow or suffering in that.
I understood that you have given Śrīpāda Trivikrama Mahārāja the copy of Padma-Purāṇa I keep for letters and reference. Ask him to return it to the library in Navadvīpa once he is finished with his work. My Vedānta-darśana (four volumes) is with him. If he does not need it anymore, please ask him to return it to me. You have prayed to develop full surrender, and therein lies the very purport of the word ātmā-sāt (one’s own). The very fact that “you are my unworthy, fallen, destitute daughter” makes you most worthy and rightly situated on this path of bhakti. This is my sincere and loving blessing to you. How is your mother? You can send your response to this letter to the Golakganj maṭha address. What more? Iti—
Forever your well-wisher,
Śrī Bhaktivedānta Vāmana
[1] Śrī Navadvīpa-bhāva-taraṅga (11) by Śrīla Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura
[2] Gaurāṅgera Du’ṭī Pada (3)
[3] See Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta (Antya-līlā 20.22)
[4] Śrī Caitanya-caritāmṛta (Madhya-līlā 4.146)
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